Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Post-Graduation Thought Bubble

It seems the full-time work idea has not worked out. Instead, I have three part-time jobs. And I really do love them all. I'm still working at the church as Administrative Secretary and WCHS as Choreographer and Assistant Director for the musical production of Zombie Prom. In addition, I've recently started a new position as Front Desk Office Manager for the Academy of Music and Art. My boss has studied dance at Juilliard, School of American Ballet, and the San Francisco Ballet School, and studied under dance masters Suki Shorer, Susan Pilarre, and Antonia Tumkovsky. She's quite quirky and fun in personality and I really enjoy working with her.

At this point, two and a half months following graduation, I find that I am still tired. Brittany says I have a lot of catching up to do from 4 1/2 years of being employed while getting through collage. I must say I agree with her logic. But, tired though I am, it is a different sort of tiredness than when I was in college working and interning all at the same time. I haven't quite placed what the difference is. Perhaps I'm just forgetting what that used to feel like.

Now, the fatigue comes from being out every morning to evening and having to get used to having only 30-40-minute conversations with Jason. Because I'm at work all day and he has night classes, our conversations get pushed back and end up taking place right before retiring to bed to do it all over again. And I miss him. All the while, the freedom of being without homework and studying is refreshing. It's an odd mixture of feelings, post graduation. Busy-Tired but Free.

I find, more than ever, I return home at the end of the day in need of alone-time. Being the introvert that I undoubtably am, I love the solitude that was unobtainable during my college years. Sometimes, though, it makes me question whether or not I'm a friendly social person at all and then I feel a little guilty. While I still spend quality time with friends (in the one-on-one setting), it wears on me to be out and about all-the-live-long-day, and I notice that social outings have begun to occur, on average, a mere two times a week. I'm okay with that, but it gets me thinking.

And I keep asking myself why I don't just move up north for Jason's remaining education. And I know all the reasons why I'm not, but I miss him.


Jason Pestell said...

Tu me manques aussi, Kimi. The period of time in which one initially finds oneself as a post-graduate is a very strange time; and a sense of timeline is less defined in which the definite future is indefinitely placed upon it and the looming feeling that excess time could be spent more wisely - in ways that would benefit oneself and their relationships with God, friends, and family, as well as strangers - quite often is disconcerting.