Bitter-sweet

It is finished.  I'm still processing it.  It really is bitter-sweet.  I cried several times watching beloved students perform with their brilliantly creative instructors supporting them from the stage wings.  I was so proud of our students and so proud of our teachers.  I stood there and remembered why I've worked so hard these past years.  I remembered why it is all worth it, even now.

There's so much I feel is left undone.  I don't work there anymore, but I feel the need to tie up loose ends.  Probably because everything was so rushed at the end.  I didn't really turn over projects to my successors.  That will come on a Saturday when there aren't students there.  It just feels like a "..." ending.

The hardest part was that feeling that I was saying goodbye during my last week and a half there, but no one knew about it.  Since I was offered the job a mere week and a half before the recitals, my boss thought it best to make it through the show without alarming everyone.  I understood.  Breaking everyone's concentration with bad news right before the show would be unfair to them and all their hard work.

A special letter has gone out to all the instructors and Apphia is throwing me a Going Away party next week with all of them.  I have composed another e-mail to all the families, but this is where I am feeling a distinct lack of closure.  My last day of work was the recitals, so by the time they hear I'm leaving, I'll be gone.  The next time I see them again, I'll be a visitor.  It all feels very strange.

Meanwhile, I need to get my act together as I begin my new job on Monday (and that is exciting... and a little scary).