Tuesday, July 10, 2007

cement (and that's just all)

a twitter and a loss. it turns out that the pavement was still wet. and i've just stepped into it. my feet are now encased in concrete and i am in an utter state of frustration as i can no longer move from this place in which i had no desire to find myself. but no matter how i flail my arms, only the air surrounding me tastes the difference. the concrete is having an affect on me. it is hard and cold and it seems to strain the very life from me, gradually creeping its way up and eventually encasing a heart that strives to beat (but only halfheartedly) for it is tired. beleaguered with encroaching states of minds that i had hoped were extinct by now, i only want to fall asleep.

i can't seem to breathe without my lungs straining so. and the only help was left at home and there are hours between then and now.

what must i do to be thankful, O God? i am struggling and i know it must be getting old to You. how weak am i to be so affected by disappointment and hardship?

i'm so tired and the apathetic greys are surrounding again.


Jason Pestell said...

You can still be thankful that He is there, that He has left His Word to be read, and in so doing, you can be filled with His Holy Spirit. You can still be thankful for all that He has done, and for all that He will do according to His plans and His promises. You can still be thankful that you have been placed into our relationship, because of which you are the most important friend and companion that I have and hope to ever have aside from Him; I know that I am thankful for you.